I haven’t watched a ball being bowled since the World Cup final. I can’t bring myself to.

For a cricket nut, who refreshes his phone every second to consume any arbitrary morsel that my Cricinfo app happens to serve up, this is a long famine.

Am I ready to feast again? Truth is, I don’t really know.

It’s not even that the lead up to THAT day was compelling viewing. The tournament limped along and there were so many games of zero consequence. I wasn’t even sure whether to watch the final or the tennis.

Added to the depressing theme, the Saffas were unbelievably bad.

I still scratch my head at Faf’s ‘we don’t need the deal, it’s-ok-if-we-lose-a-few -games’ pre-tournament speech.

What a doos! He may be worth R200 million and have a haircut for which the ladies in Pretoria ‘smaak him stukkend’, but who says shit like that?

Its not a Sunday league game, you are the captain of your country and it f%&#*g DOES matter that you don’t care whether you win or you lose or tie for that matter.

But back to that day.

There have been so many brilliant articles written on cricket and the final but my favourite one is titled ‘If Cricket died tomorrow, we would still have this game’ by Sambit Bal … so for me to even attempt to rehash the events of that day would be inappropriate.

One of the coolest things to happen was for Ben Stokes to be nominated for New Zealander of the year. What a good bloke. As we all know he was awarded 6 crucial runs at the death via a freak ricochet off his bat. He attempted to refuse the 6, in actual fact he didn’t even want 5. He felt he only deserved 2.

A year ago he spent the day in jail and many months waiting for his judgment day.

He must still be swigging from the champagne bottle.

As should most of the English who also got out of jail at Lords that day.

Their luck was like calling red ten times on the spin at the roulette table.

What a spectacle.

And that’s why we are all probably not ready for the Ashes.

Serious cricket lovers live for the Ashes. The television coverage is always brilliant, the commentary is outstanding, and there is inevitably drama.

For me it’s the most watchable television imaginable. And 25 days worth of test matches is about to start on Thursday. I haven’t seen the team sheets yet and I only know that the opening game is at Edgbaston because my Dad told me this morning.

The party, post the most unbelievable game ever witnessed, has not yet finished. Please give us a bit more time to finish our last whiskeys, head home in our Uber’s and deal with our hangovers.

Written by Francois Bruyns

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